As I grew older, life took an unexpected turn when, at 17, I ended up homeless in a shelter. I dropped out of high school, got three fast-food jobs and focused on survival. Work was my lifeline at that stage—my escape from reality and the only way to create a better life. 

I eventually left the homeless shelter and got my apartment. At one of the jobs, I met the woman who would become my wife, and we got married the day after I turned 18.

My work history continued with jobs in retail and getting my CDL at 18. With each new job, my salary was higher, and I felt more accomplished. It felt good to support my wife and my first child at age 19. 

Whenever I met someone new, they’d ask, “What do you do?” I was happy to tell them about my job and my high salary as a 19-year-old. Without knowing it, I was tying my identity and measure of success to my work. 

This pattern and mindset of work being my everything would continue to build over 20 years. It wasn’t until my children started entering the workforce that I realized my identity was ingrained in my work. My Gen Z children taught me lessons about work that my generation didn’t, and it has changed me. Here’s how.

Growing up in an immigrant household meant a focus on work

My mother is an African woman from Mombasa, Kenya, and my stepfather is from the Democratic Republic of the Congo. I’m a first-generation African American who grew up with two parents who often talked about the struggles our family faced trying to make a living in Africa.

My mother would tell us that a good job was the key to a successful life. The importance of work was cemented in my mindset. As an adult, I felt so proud to be able to name-drop well-known companies like Pepsi or QuadGraphics when telling others about my work.

At 19, I had the opportunity to start my first business, a vacation-relief service for independent bread vendors. The company cost $100 to start, had low expenses and quickly grew into a highly profitable business. My family was proud.

My identity and how I saw success was deepened toward my work. When my business revenue increased, I was the happiest person you’d ever met; when sales were slow—I felt like a loser.

I learned there’s more to life than work

When my Gen Z children started working, I would ask them about their jobs. I was often surprised at how they viewed work and what their jobs meant to them. I have five Gen Z children who work traditional jobs, and our oldest owns a business. 

My Gen Z children see their jobs as a way to earn money to live and do things outside of work. They work to live—not live to work.

They don’t buy into the belief that you work hard for most of your adult life to enjoy the last few years. They told me they use their sick days and other company benefits, such as vacation time, mental health days and discounts offered for employees on merchandise and stays (one works at a hotel). They don’t see this as being a bad or uncommitted employee.

Much commentary is offered about Gen Z. What I see missing from this conversation is that Gen Z is the first generation that doesn’t tie their identity to their work, and to see there’s more to life than work. 

“(Gen Z’s) attitude is slightly different because they come in without all the baggage that other generations have carried. (Gen Z) cares more about their life balance than other generations have, and they’re not willing to sacrifice their time like other generations have,” says Melanie K. Hall, a licensed clinical professional counselor, therapist and coach.

Tying your identity to work can be unhealthy

I can’t tell you how often someone has told me they feel Gen Z is lazy and doesn’t care about their jobs like previous generations have. However, many previous generations aren’t aware how unhealthy it can be to tie your identity to your work.

Charese L. Josie, a licensed clinical therapist and leadership development trainer who’s worked with different generations in the workforce, says we don’t realize that work has an end date—there’s an achievement wall. 

“When we get to that job that we long for, even if we get a promotion, there’s an end date. We have now achieved that goal. And then what we’re not taught is, then, who are we now once that end date has [been] achieved?… We have no idea what’s next for us and who we are, and what’s the next thing for us to grab onto,” says Josie. 

I’m 44 years old, and that’s not what my immigrant parents taught me about work growing up. These conversations with my Gen Z children made me realize how much of my identity I had attached to my work.

When I noticed how work was affecting my mindset, I knew I needed help. I decided to get therapy. I’ve had therapy regularly over the past six years, and it’s helped me see that success, growth and who I am are more than what I do for work. 

“I not only think it’s unhealthy, I think it’s dangerous to tie our identity to work because work is ever evolving,” says Josie. 

Creating a work-optional life is my goal now

My Gen Z children in the workforce helped me understand lessons about life and work that my generation didn’t. I’ve seen them work and earn money to travel, take time off, not work as much as possible, and fund their retirement accounts in earnest so they may retire early and create a life where work becomes optional. Work isn’t the first or main thing they discuss when meeting someone new; it’s how they enjoy life. I’ve seen two of my kids quit jobs that didn’t align with their values and take less pay for jobs that do. I’ve seen them ignore work communication outside of working hours and watched them stick to the strong boundaries they’ve set for their work parameters.

Their outlook, along with therapy, changed my mindset and helped me detach work from being a major part of my identity.

My goal is to spend my working time only on things that contribute to my personal and professional development, and to use my businesses to build financial independence. I’m taking what I earn and investing as much as possible into assets that make my money work for me. 

I aim to create a work-optional life that allows me to spend my time, attention and energy living a life of freedom where I don’t have to work if I don’t want to. I used to work seven days a week, but now I take off every weekend. I don’t answer client correspondence outside of normal business hours, and I don’t take meetings anymore. 

My wife and I get massages, enjoy fancy meals and spend hours in our favorite place, bookstores, every weekend. I spend more time on my personal development, reading books, watching YouTube videos and listening to fiction audiobooks. I’ve set a goal to take more vacation time than work days, and I understand now that how I achieve success is much broader in scope than what I do for work.

Photo from Kimanzi Constable

The post I Have 5 Gen Z Children in the Workforce. They Taught Me Not to Make Work My Identity appeared first on SUCCESS.

Success isn’t limited to one specific era, and there are plenty of opportunities to be inspired by the wisdom of these great minds’ great quotes. After all, we can all live victorious lives, finding our passions and discovering what success means to us.

Get inspired by these 40 famous success quotes from great minds. Their powerful words might be just what you need to get started on your own journey of growth and success. Take the insight of some of the brightest minds of all time and make it your own.

Quotes About Success From The World’s Greatest Minds

Great minds have used their knowledge to achieve goals and break barriers to succeed in life. Find inspiration in these quotes about how to succeed from some of history’s greatest minds. After all, famous phrases about success can go a long way to inspire our own excellence.

• “Develop success from failures. Discouragement and failure are two of the surest stepping stones to success.” —Dale Carnegie
• “Try not to become a person of success, but rather try to become a person of virtue.” —Albert Einstein
• “I have learned that success is to be measured not so much by the position that one has reached in life as by the obstacles which he has overcome while trying to succeed.”—Booker T. Washington
• “Failure is the condiment that gives success its flavor.” —Truman Capote
• “The talent of success is nothing more than doing what you can do, well.” —Henry W. Longfellow 
• “I don’t measure a man’s success by how high he climbs but how high he bounces when he hits bottom.” —Gen. George S. Patton
• “Success is a science; if you have the conditions, you get the result.” —Oscar Wilde
• “Action is the foundational key to all success.” —Pablo Picasso
• “Many of life’s failures are people who did not realize how close they were to success when they gave up.” —Thomas A. Edison
• “Always bear in mind that your own resolution to success is more important than any other one thing.”—Abraham Lincoln
• “The secret of success is to do the common thing uncommonly well.” —John D. Rockefeller Jr.
• “All successful men have agreed in one thing—they were causationists. They believed that things went not by luck, but by law; that there was not a weak or a cracked link in the chain that joins the first and last of things.” —Ralph Waldo Emerson

Related: Powerful Quotes From Successful Entrepreneurs 

Thought-Provoking Quotes About Great Minds 

“Great minds think alike,” at least according to 17th-century playwright Dabridgcourt Belchier. But is it true? Here are some great minds’ quotes that may prove he was accurate—or not. 

• “The fool doth think he is wise, but the wise man knows himself to be a fool.” —William Shakespeare

• “Little minds are tamed and subdued by misfortune, but great minds rise above them.” —Washington Irving
• “Every now and then a man’s mind is stretched by a new idea or sensation, and never shrinks back to its former dimensions.” —Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr.
• “A simple and independent mind does not toil at the bidding of any prince. Genius is not a retainer to any emperor.” —Henry David Thoreau
• “A genius is often merely a talented person who has done all of his or her homework.” —Thomas Edison
• “To make the common marvellous, as if it were a revelation, is the test of genius.” —James Russell Lowell
• “The tough mind is sharp and penetrating. It breaks through the crust of legends and myths, and sifts the true from the false.” —Martin Luther King Jr.
• “You only get one mind and one body, and it’s got to last a lifetime.” —Warren Buffett

Related: 10 Inspiring Quotes On Innovation

What Great Minds Discuss: Motivational Sayings to Expand Your View

What can you do with a great mind? How does the genius of a great mind work? Do great minds discuss ideas, people, things or events? Throughout the ages, many people have had ideas about how to motivate a great mind and why it’s important to push boundaries. Read these quotes and decide for yourself. 

• “Those who believe they can achieve the object of their definite chief aim do not recognize the word impossible.” —Napoleon Hill 
• “Times of general calamity and confusion, have ever been productive of  for the greatest minds.” —Charles Caleb Colton 
• “If the people really set their minds on anything, it is impossible to prevent their getting what they want.” —Henry Ford

• “Small minds discuss other people, gossip. Good minds discuss events. Great minds discuss ideas.” —Denzel Washington
• “Dedicate yourself to the good you deserve and desire for yourself. Give yourself peace of mind. You deserve to be happy.” —Mark Victor Hansen
• “Live the full life of the mind, exhilarated by new ideas, intoxicated by the Romance of the unusual.” —Ernest Hemingway
• “Great thoughts speak only to the thoughtful mind, but great actions speak to all mankind.” —Emily P. Bissell
• “A man may die, nations may rise and fall, but an idea lives on.” —John F. Kennedy
• “Everything around you that you call life was made up by people that were no smarter than you and you can change it, you can influence it, you can build your own things that other people can use.” —Steve Jobs 
• “You are what you are and where you are because of what has gone into your mind. You can change what you are and where you are by changing what goes into your mind.” —Zig Ziglar
•  “Men and women range themselves into three classes or orders of intelligence; you can tell the lowest class by their habit of always talking about persons; the next by the fact that their habit is always to converse about things; the highest by their preference for the discussion of ideas.” -—Charles Stewart

Related link: 17 Motivational Quotes to Help You Achieve Your Dreams

Powerful Quotes From Some of The Greatest Minds Of All Time 

A strong mindset and willingness to seek wisdom have been the ideals of some of the greatest minds in history. If we reach back in time, we can gain some powerful inspiration. Thanks to these words from some of the greatest minds, we can further our own wisdom and get motivation to grow our intellect.

• “Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.” —Aristotle
• “A great mind becomes a great fortune.” —Seneca the Younger
• ‘“The mind is not a vessel that needs filling, but wood that needs igniting.” —Plutarch
• “Minds are of three kinds: one is capable of thinking for itself; another is able to understand the thinking of others; and a third can neither think for itself nor understand the thinking of others. The first is of the highest excellence, the second is excellent, and the third is worthless.” —Nicolo Machiavelli

• “If you know the enemy and know yourself, you need not fear the result of a hundred battles.” —Sun Tzu
• “A mind without instruction can no more bear fruit than can a field, however fertile, without cultivation.” —Cicero
• “A full belly is little worth when the mind is starved.” —Mark Twain

Be Inspired By History’s Greatest Minds 

You don’t have to be famous or a philosopher to find your own inspiration from great minds. So use the ideas and thoughts to move you to think differently in your everyday life. Be motivated by some of the greatest minds of all time to live your life to its fullest. And if great minds discuss ideas with others, you can try sharing these quotes to get the conversation started. 

Photo by Alpha Media Shutterstock/Shutterstock

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Parents, grandparents, teachers, coaches, movie stars, wrestlers—basically, anyone who has lived enough under the sun—all have something to say about the benefits of discipline and its role in personal growth, productivity and success. Needless to say, all of them are right.

For some, discipline is the key to everything they want. For others, it’s what keeps them going forward amid challenges. However, everyone agrees that it’s difficult. 

Discipline requires resisting impulses, stopping procrastinating, eliminating distractions and focusing on what really matters. None of this is easy unless you have a well-thought-out plan. This is where setting clear, actionable goals becomes important. Read on to learn how to set discipline goals and build self-discipline. 

The Power Of Self-Discipline

Self-discipline offers many great benefits for work, personal life and beyond.

Improved Focus And Productivity

A study conducted with 377 college students found that individuals with a stronger sense of self-discipline are less likely to procrastinate in daily life and academics. In other words, discipline helps beat procrastination—an arch nemesis of productivity.

Learning how to be disciplined also keeps you in control of your thoughts and emotions, making you more focused on your tasks and, hence, more productive.

Better Time Management And Consistency

M. Scott Peck, an American psychiatrist and author, once wrote, “Until you value yourself, you won’t value your time. Until you value your time, you will not do anything with it.” 

Indeed, when you start valuing your goals over your urges, you also start valuing your time more. You become aware of its finiteness, how you spend it and how you should spend it more efficiently. Gradually, you become better at managing your time, which helps you consistently achieve your goals for days, weeks, months and years.

Increased Self-Confidence And Resilience

Confidence is among the most rewarding benefits of self-discipline. Every task you check off motivates you to do the next task. Over time, as you see yourself ticking off goals via sheer discipline, your self-confidence fires up.

This confidence makes you show up even on days you feel like giving up, making you more resilient and reinforcing discipline—continuing the cycle.

What Is A Discipline Goal?

A discipline goal is a commitment that helps you build self-discipline via self-control, consistency and habits. Unlike regular goals, discipline goals focus not on your desired outcomes but on improving the processes that lead you to the outcomes.

Unfortunately, we are all so used to setting outcome-based goals that we forget to care about the processes. For example:

• Getting straight A’s in school
• Reading a trending bestselling book
• Learning to play the guitar
• Buying a house

The list never ends, but there is a catch: fixating solely on the outcomes doesn’t work. 

While regular goals tell you where you want to go, discipline shows you how. So, contrary to outcome-based goals, discipline goals sound very different and could include:

• Studying for three hours every day after school
• Reading 10 pages of a book every day
• Attending guitar lessons and practicing every day
• Saving a fixed minimum amount of money every month

This way, discipline goals not only help you achieve your goals; they also help you build habits that set you up for betterment and long-term growth.

How to Set Discipline Goals That Stick

Practicing self-discipline, in itself, is not a goal but a habit—and a very tough one at that. But, setting discipline goals can keep you on track. Here are the steps to set effective discipline goals:

1. Identify Your Priorities

Self-discipline starts with prioritizing the things that truly matter. To do that, create to-do lists for the day’s most important tasks and check them off before the end. Or follow the Eisenhower matrix approach and categorize tasks into four categories in this order:

1. Urgent and important
2. Urgent but not important
3. Not urgent but important 
4. Not urgent and not important

Organizing your tasks in this way will help you put your best efforts into the things that matter the most and manage your time more efficiently.

2. Set SMART Goals

The SMART framework is among the best goal-setting models for the workplace and life. It ensures that your goals are:

• Specific
• Measurable
• Attainable
• Relevant
• Time-bound

For example, if you want to read more, here’s what a SMART goal might sound like:

“I want to finish four books over the next two months by reserving 30 minutes after dinner to read and minimizing distractions by switching my phone off while reading.”

Remember that the better the quality of your goals, the greater your chances of achieving them. 

3. Break Goals Into Smaller Habits

Ironically, often, the secret to achieving big goals is starting small. You can be more disciplined without getting too overwhelmed by dividing big, tough tasks into smaller, doable chunks. For example:

• To build a reading habit, pick up a short book and read five pages every day. 

• To improve your self-care, build one habit (like getting seven hours of sleep) at a time. 

• If you want to get promoted at work, start taking on leadership roles, completing relevant training and seeking mentorship.

4. Write Down Your Goals

Writing your goals down on paper helps bring them out of your head and into the real world. Take a piece of paper, jot your goals on it and stick it on a wall. These written goals will keep reminding you of your ambitions and keep you on track when distracted.

5. Track Your Progress

The only person you must compare yourself with on the path of self-discipline is your past self, and that’s why you should keep monitoring your progress regularly. Here are some ways to do that:

• Maintain to-do lists to manage daily tasks
• Keep a journal to reflect on your daily or weekly progress
• Mark your calendar every day you check 90% off your to-do list
• Use habit-tracking apps like Habitica, Streaks, StickK, and Habitify

Self-Discipline Exercises to Build Long-Term Habits

Think of self-discipline as an endless ladder. It takes you to new heights, but only if you keep climbing. However, going up against the gravity of procrastination, distractions and similar evils needs practice, and these self-discipline exercises can help:

1. Time Blocking

Time blocking is a time-management technique in which you divide your day into several fixed time slots. You block each time slot for a single task or group of tasks and do nothing else during that time. 

For example, you can block 7-8 a.m. for exercise and meditation, 8-9 a.m. for shower and breakfast, the next 30 minutes for responding to emails, the two subsequent hours for focused work and so on. Since we only get 24 hours per day, time blocking is a great way to efficiently utilize those fixed hours.

2. The 2-Minute Rule

David Allen introduced “the 2-minute rule” in his book Getting Things Done. The rule states that if something takes less than two minutes to complete, you should do it as soon as you think of it. This approach helps you beat procrastination, as many times, we procrastinate small tasks until they add up and become too much to handle. 

3. Mindfulness And Meditation

To stay disciplined, focus on the present rather than past mistakes or future uncertainties. Practicing mindfulness techniques such as meditation can relieve stress and help you stay in the present moment.

Here are some ways to practice mindfulness:

• Breathing meditations: Focus on your breath for as little as two minutes per day
• Mindful journaling: Jot down your thoughts, feelings and emotions every day
• Single-tasking: Do one task at a time with full focus (try time blocking)

The more present you are in an action, the higher the quality of your efforts.

4. Delayed Gratification

Delayed gratification is the practice of resisting immediate rewards to get greater, more valuable rewards later. 

For example, suppose you want to lose weight, so you resist your cravings throughout the week and reserve Sundays for your favorite sweet snack. You delay the reward of having sweets for the greater reward of shedding some extra pounds and feeling healthier.

Delayed gratification helps you avoid temptations and say yes to what’s truly important.

5. Monk Mode

Monk mode is exactly what it sounds like—adopting a monk-like attitude to achieve your goals. It’s not a specific exercise but a period during which you fully commit yourself to something. Going into monk mode is ideal for achieving a single goal within a rough time frame (usually a few days to weeks).

For example, you may have to write a research paper, train for a marathon, lose 10 pounds or meet a tight deadline. Fixate on the goal, create a strict routine and rules, eliminate all distractions and get to work.

Take Charge Of Your Life With Self-Discipline

Building self-discipline is hard, especially if you struggle with procrastination, instant gratification and poor focus. But the good news is that habits like task prioritization and setting SMART goals, coupled with exercises like time blocking and delayed gratification, can help you be more disciplined—one step at a time.

There is no need to aim too big in the beginning. Identify just one area of your life that needs improvement, set a discipline goal and start from there. With time and consistency, your self-discipline will create a domino effect of success across other areas of your life.

Photo from Khosro/Shutterstock.com

The post How to Set Discipline Goals And Take Charge Of Your Life appeared first on SUCCESS.

Developing strong communication and public speaking skills can both open up new professional opportunities and deepen relationships. You’ll also bolster your confidence and feel more comfortable going into new situations. It’s well worth the effort to become a good communicator, especially when there are simple techniques to help you overcome barriers standing in your way.  

This guide will explain why learning how to speak well and comfortably in public is so important. We’ll also share some simple but effective public speaking tips and how to develop communication skills for success.

Types Of Communication And Key Skills

There are four basic types of communication: verbal, non-verbal, written and visual. Depending on our roles and positions, we may use multiple types each day. When interacting with others and engaging in public speaking, we tend to use multiple types, such as non-verbal and visual communication (in addition to verbal). Effective communication skills that can help us be more successful include: learning to speak with clarity and confidence, using emotional intelligence to communicate with empathy and respect, developing active listening skills, being responsive to feedback and being adaptable to the needs of our audience or those we’re communicating with. 

The Importance Of Communication Skills For Success

If you want to expand your professional opportunities and excel in your career, developing strong communication skills for success is key. In fact, LinkedIn data revealed that communication was the most in-demand skill among employers in 2024. 

So, how can improving your communication skills and public speaking abilities impact your career success? When you can share ideas and information effectively, it makes you a better leader, enables you to give more effective presentations and makes teamwork easier since you can inform and inspire others. 

Strong communication skills can help you outside of work as well. Divorce.com reports that communication issues are one of the leading causes of marriages ending, while Verywell Mind explains that communication issues lead to stress and toxic relationships as small problems turn into larger ones when people can’t effectively communicate to resolve them.

When we’re able to effectively communicate our thoughts, preferences and needs, we can set ourselves up for success both personally and professionally. 

Overcoming Barriers to Effective Communication And Public Speaking 

To reap the benefits of becoming a better speaker, it’s important to understand some of the biggest barriers to effective communication. 

Fear of public speaking is a significant challenge people face. Between 72% and 75% of the public fear public speaking, and it’s hard to be great at something you’re afraid of.  That’s especially true if your worries about speaking in front of others prevent you from practicing and developing this talent. 

A lack of clarity and poor listening skills are also common problems. If you aren’t an empathetic, responsive listener, it becomes harder to tell if your audience is responding to you. This makes it more difficult to become an effective speaker. Failing to clarify your ideas in your own mind is also an obstacle to sharing your thoughts and preferences with others. 

Techniques For Mastering Public Speaking

While some people have a natural talent for public speaking, those who aren’t born with this ability can still develop this skill. In fact, many people overcome the barriers that affect their ability to communicate effectively and go on to become skilled orators. It just takes the right techniques. 

Some of the best ways to become a better speaker and develop communication skills for success include:

• Preparation: If you are confident in what you’re going to say, it’s easier to say it well. Research the subjects you are speaking on so you feel fully informed. Outline your presentation so you’ll have a plan for presenting information in a logical, cohesive way. You can also practice your speech or presentation to gain confidence. 
• Delivery: Effective speakers focus on audience engagement. They don’t speak too fast or too slow, and their body language helps them present as confident and informed. You can practice your delivery to develop these skills by speaking in front of a mirror or recording yourself and watching for changes you can make. 
• Storytelling: Weaving a narrative can help engage and interest people in the information you’re sharing. Look for ways to make your message both memorable and relatable by painting a picture through storytelling—instead of just relaying facts. 

Implementing these tips for public speaking can help you to build communication skills for professional success and communicate more effectively in your personal life as well. 

Building Strong Communication Skills

Whether you plan to speak publicly or professionally, or simply want to talk and share more effectively with co-workers, bosses, family and friends, you can also implement different techniques to improve your communication skills. These include:

• Developing active listening habits: Active listening means closely focusing on the verbal and non-verbal information others are presenting. It means not just thinking about what you’re going to say next, but deeply hearing the words and messages of those around you. The better you become at listening, the better your communication skills will be as you develop a deeper understanding of the needs of others. 
• Practicing non-verbal communication: Eye contact and gestures affect how you convey information and impact the way others respond. Practice making eye contact when you’re speaking. Pay attention to your gestures to make mastering public speaking easier and become an inviting presence. 
• Learning to tailor your message to different audiences: Finally, you need to know your audience so you can communicate on their level. Different people respond and process information in their own unique ways, and you’ll do better at getting your message across if you meet people where they are. Communication skills for workplace success may differ from those you need for personal relationships, so it’s important to develop effective messages for both audiences. 

Practical Public Speaking Tips For Real-World Application

The good news is that there are many ways you can implement these techniques in the real world to become a better speaker and develop effective communication techniques. Some action steps you can take to become a great communicator include:

• Engage in opportunities to practice, such as Toastmasters or work presentations: Practice can go a long way toward improving your public speaking skills, so look for opportunities to speak publicly. Toastmasters International is an excellent group where you can develop your talents and learn public speaking tips. Or, you can simply sign up to give presentations at work as often as you can to help build your communication skills for career success.
• Record and review your speaking engagements to identify areas for improvement: Recording yourself and reviewing your performance can help you identify areas for improvement. Focus on things like the pace and flow of your speech, your body language and your responsiveness to the audience. 
• Use feedback constructively to refine your skills: Ask others around you to provide feedback on how effective your presentation was so you can look for areas of improvement and better understand your strengths and weaknesses. 

Communication Skills And Public Speaking Go Hand In Hand 

Strong communication skills for success can be the foundation for a successful life because many things you do in your personal and professional relationships involve sharing ideas and information with others. 

Identifying effective communication strategies for leaders, preparing for speeches, learning how good communication skills lead to success and working on your delivery can help you become a better communicator. You’ll develop not just the ability to speak well but also a level of comfort with public speaking that will go a long way toward making you a confident, skilled orator who inspires others around you.

Photo by Jacob Lund/Shutterstock.com

The post Enhance Your Public Speaking And Communication Skills For Success appeared first on SUCCESS.

“It’s costly to struggle with poor emotional intelligence,” says psychotherapist Lauren Farina. According to her, low EQ can be a big liability to both individuals and organizations, “because we know that [it] disrupts communication, it disrupts relationships, it damages mental health. And all of those are huge factors when it comes to performance and motivation and productivity.”

The 4 pillars of emotional intelligence

There are generally four pillars of EQ:

1. Self-awareness
2. Self-management
3. Social awareness
4. Relationship management

These represent the intersection of your awareness and actions toward yourself and others. As the founder of Invited Psychotherapy and Coaching, Farina helps professionals level up their performance, motivation and emotional well-being. That often involves developing a healthy EQ, which is imperative for mental health, emotional well-being and career success.

“High EQ can help us to attune to and connect with our clients and colleagues in a way that optimizes that relationship for a mutually beneficial outcome,” she says. “On the other hand, many folks with an extremely high EQ, often referred to as empaths, struggle with taking too much responsibility for the feelings of others. This tendency makes us vulnerable to people-pleasing and codependency, making it difficult to be assertive and to set boundaries.”

Is your emotional intelligence an asset or a hindrance? Here are a few ways to assess and improve it, regardless of where you fall on the EQ spectrum.

1. Look at your relationships

Individuals who have a healthy level of emotional intelligence often enjoy strong personal and professional relationships, Farina says. They work well on a team and have solid people skills. “You can have difficult conversations,” she says. “You’re not afraid of confrontation, but you have those difficult conversations with respect and compassion.”

But those who struggle with poor or low emotional intelligence often experience a lot of conflict in their relationships. They might be prone to increased irritability, anger and resentment, which can manifest as constant venting in the workplace, Farina says. Other signs you might benefit from emotional intelligence-building practices include struggling to manage stress and regulate your emotions and jumping to defensiveness instead of giving and receiving feedback effectively.

“If you find yourself constantly venting or being negative or responding with sarcasm, you’ve probably got some unprocessed emotions that need identification and expression,” Farina says.

On the other hand, you might have a very high EQ if you struggle to set boundaries because you’re scared of letting other people down. “When we fail to set boundaries, we tend to grow more resentful of others,” Farina says. “I often tell my clients, ‘When we feel resentful, it’s because we’ve often failed to advocate for ourselves.’”

To strike a healthy balance, tune into how you’re feeling and learn to express yourself with respect and compassion. “It’s a matter of sort of observing, ‘What am I thinking? What am I feeling? And how are those thoughts and feelings driving my behaviors?’” Farina says. “That’s essentially what we mean when we talk about mindfulness practice, which is something I recommend to my clients a lot.”

2. Make meaning through your childhood experiences

According to psychotherapist Duygu Balan, who specializes in intergenerational trauma, early attachments promote emotional intelligence and influence how we connect to and talk to ourselves. They also predict whether we allow ourselves to feel our feelings or not, whether we think it is safe to be vulnerable and our ability to be in tune with somebody else’s emotions.

According to Balan, children who grow up in secure homes with parents who encourage them to name their emotions and who validate their emotions tend to have higher emotional intelligence. “They’re better able to feel their feelings, know what they are and… have better coping mechanisms,” she says.

“But the good news is that because secure attachment styles [aren’t] genetic, we can actually level up… through awareness-building,” she says. “We level up through making meaning through our childhood experiences and having safe relationship experiences, whether this is through therapy or community resources or members. But that’s how we can increase our understanding of ourselves. The more we do it, the more we heal.”

3. Write down your values and the characteristics of your authentic self

Therapist Priya Rednam-Waldo recommends starting from a place of self-awareness.

“We cannot know where we need to go without understanding where we are now and… some key points of how we got there,” says Rednam-Waldo, who coaches women and couples navigating the unique transition from pregnancy to postpartum. “It doesn’t have to be this huge unpacking of a lifetime of [experiences], but it is a deeply personal experience where we have to kind of be ready to take stock,” she says.

By identifying your values and whether or not you’re living them or not, you can figure out where you are in life and whether your EQ is working for you. This can feel really challenging, “because often that’s an indication… [that] we’re not maybe as emotionally intelligent as would be helpful for our lives if we aren’t quickly able to say, ‘Oh yeah, this is who I am, and this is what I believe,’” Rednam-Waldo says.

Keep in mind that boosting your EQ isn’t about changing yourself to fit a preconceived mold of what it means to be a great leader, team member, partner or parent. It’s about honoring who you are. “We can all have areas of improvement,” Rednam-Waldo says. “We can be ourselves and honor other people being themselves and still be really successful.”

4. Schedule a regular check-in with yourself

Set aside time, ideally daily, to identify your highs and lows. Jot down on paper or type in a notes app a few key events or points of the day and how you reacted emotionally. If you have a data-driven mind, you can even give the events a rating. Then, look for patterns over time. “The highs will be in a particular space and the lows will be in a particular space,” Rednam-Waldo says.

A recurring low could be a particular interaction with a team member at work that makes you feel misunderstood, which you can turn into an opportunity to realign your actions with your values and true authentic self.

5. Accept that improving your EQ is a dynamic journey—not a destination

The human experience is unpredictable and is filled with interactions both challenging and joyful. That means there’s no one-size-fits-all approach, and you might have to put different levels of effort into it over time, depending on the progress of your EQ. “As we feel stronger in our emotional intelligence, we won’t have to necessarily check in daily. Maybe we spread it out to monthly,” Rednam-Waldo says. “Maybe… it becomes a part of how we think about things or assess how things are working for us.” 

Photo credit: fizkes/Shutterstock.com

The post How To Know if Your Emotional Intelligence Is Doing You a Disservice appeared first on SUCCESS.

The good news is, if you develop the ability to speak in public with confidence and ease, this will give you a big leg up in life since it’s a skill so many people don’t have. This guide will explain more about the benefits people get from engaging in public speaking so you can better understand why this is such an important talent to develop.

5 Powerful Benefits Of Public Speaking

The benefits of public speaking extend to every area of your life. Here are some of the key ways that becoming a good speaker can enhance both your personal and professional life. 

1. Improve Your Personal Development

Why is public speaking important for personal growth? There are multiple reasons. If you are one of the many people with public speaking anxiety, then overcoming your fear of public speaking could be an important personal development goal. Facing your fears allows for personal growth and helps you to become a more confident person as you realize you are capable of doing the things that you were frightened of.  

When you learn how to manage your anxiety surrounding public speaking, this can also help you overcome other life fears that are holding you back. Accomplishing big things often is scary and requires you to push yourself outside of your comfort zone. The more you force yourself to do things you are afraid of, the greater heights you can reach.

Beyond facing your fears, there are other benefits of public speaking for your personal development as well. Becoming a better storyteller helps you communicate your preferences and ideas more clearly when you’re speaking with others. As a result, you’re more likely to have your needs met and your thoughts respected.

2. Access New Professional Opportunities

Many successful entrepreneurs are excellent public speakers. That’s because being able to convey ideas clearly helps them to inspire investors, attract customers and inform employees so they can understand and execute the company’s vision.

Even if entrepreneurship doesn’t interest you, public speaking is also important to advance your career prospects for many reasons. 

• When you are a good public speaker, networking is easier so you can develop new professional connections that open the door to more opportunities.
• Speaking clearly and confidently in public helps you demonstrate leadership qualities in the workplace. If you put together a killer presentation in meetings and deliver it with ease, you stand out among staff members and are more likely to advance in your career.
• Strong public speaking skills help you to persuade others that your ideas are correct and can improve your negotiating skills so resolving conflict is easier.

According to a 2024 LinkedIn study, communication skills are the top in-demand job skills. No matter what line of work you are in, you must be able to communicate effectively with people around you. Getting better at doing that is one of the many benefits of engaging in public speaking experiences.

3. Strengthen Your Communication Skills

The skills required to become a strong public speaker are assets you use in many areas of your life.

Learning to articulate ideas clearly and effectively is beneficial not only when you are giving a speech, but also in job interviews, when you’re talking with your spouse or kids, or when you’re writing a report at work.  Effective public speakers become skilled at organizing their thoughts and conveying ideas clearly—and those are skills everyone can use.

Another key part of good public speaking involves listening actively to others and engaging with the audience. Doing this effectively helps you become more responsive to social cues and more conscious of the ways you convey ideas to keep people informed and engaged.  Plus, since you also must adapt messages to different audiences, you learn to think about how best to share information in a way that resonates. 

These are transferable skills that not only make you a better public speaker but also a better communicator and a better listener—two very important life skills.

4. Make New Social Connections

Strong social relationships are the surest indicator of life happiness, according to research. When you develop your public speaking skills, you can make many new social connections—not just from formal speaking engagements but also because of your increased comfort level in social settings.

Being able to effectively share stories, ideas and viewpoints with others makes more people want to be around you and enables you to make deeper connections with those in your orbit. Then, you can develop more meaningful relationships that truly enhance your overall life satisfaction.

5. Inspire Change  

Why is public speaking important for our world? This skill goes beyond personal and even professional growth. Strong communicators shape the world. If you have causes you care about or issues you’re passionate about, public speaking skills allow you to bring others around to your viewpoint. You can also become a voice for others who might struggle to be heard.

This not only enriches your own life as you find yourself making a meaningful difference in your workplace and community, but it also helps you to enhance the lives of those around you as you convince others to implement positive change.

Grow & Succeed When You Use Your Public Speaking Skills 

If you’ve ever asked yourself why public speaking is important, the reasons above help show why this skill is so powerful and beneficial. Becoming a strong public speaker has many benefits that go beyond being able to give a good speech. Along with personal growth, professional development, strengthening your communication skills and finding new opportunities and connections, it also opens doors to inspiring change. If you want to become more empathetic, more confident, less anxious, and more successful, learning how to speak well in front of an audience can open the door to achieving all these goals and more.

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The post Why Is Public Speaking Important? 5 Key Ways It Fuels Your Success appeared first on SUCCESS.

Licensed clinical psychologist Alexandra Solomon, Ph.D., a bestselling author and host of the hit podcast Reimagining Love, argues against thinking this is a binary question.

In fact, she says it’s both.

“There are elements of consistency, and there are elements of specificity,” Solomon, author of Love Every Day, explains. There’s the me piece, the intrapsychic piece, which ought to be consistent across conversations. Then there’s the you piece, which is relational and should be tailored to the individual and the context.

On the surface, this may seem to contradict the desire to live authentically—a theme Solomon says is exceedingly popular at the moment. However, she stresses that authenticity is not about being the same in every situation—it’s far more nuanced. “It’s about effectiveness and discernment.”

Applying the four pillars of emotional quotient

Knowing how to act in every situation means tapping into your EQ. Solomon points to the four pillars of EQ: self-awareness, self-regulation, empathy and social skills—and explains how they relate to this me-you understanding of behavior.

“The first two—self-awareness, self-regulation—these are the me things,” Solomon says. Here, you ask yourself, “How am I going to come into a conversation? How am I going to handle myself in the conversation?”

Whether you’re heading into a hard conversation with an employee or a loved one, you hold yourself to certain commitments such as remaining calm, giving the benefit of the doubt and leading with kindness. She explains these ought to be consistent across all situations: “[These] are me values—the values that are reflective of how I want to be as a person.”

The remaining parts of EQ, empathy and social skills, refer to the other person—the you piece. 

This is where tailoring to the situation is key. “It is empathic to talk differently to your parent when they’re 80 than when they were 60,” Solomon says. This ability to appropriately modulate or change your communication style showcases your empathy and social skills.

The workplace is no different. “I think that part of being an effective coworker or an effective leader, certainly, is that you understand the other person,” Solomon adds. Some will better receive a critique if it’s encased in positivity. But others will feel patronized, she explains. A kind approach for them is direct and straightforward.

Questions to ask yourself in advance should include, “‘What’s going to be most effective here?’ and ‘What does this moment call for?’” Solomon suggests. These will clarify your approach and help modify behavior accordingly.

The outsized role of setting appropriate expectations

Fundamentally, there’s a need to level-set expectations no matter the scenario, Solomon points out. “What’s different, though, is what you do about it—what action you take.”

Meeting with a struggling employee means grappling with what can be fairly expected of the individual. With more training, can they succeed or are they simply a poor fit? At home, what’s reasonable to expect of your child?

“There’s something quite unkind about continuing to expect something that can’t happen,” Solomon says. It’s hard on you, too, as it’s tiresome to continue to argue with reality and wish things could be different than they really are.

“In all our relationships, we have to keep exploring what’s a reasonable expectation,” Solomon says. Otherwise, you’ll feel frustrated and the person on the other side will feel they’re a disappointment.

Stop focusing on what someone should be able to do and instead challenge yourself to reimagine expectations, she counsels. Abandoning unrealistic expectations is kind—and in the case of an unsuccessful employee, sometimes letting them go is an act of kindness.

When family and business collide

Plot twist: What if you work in a family business, which can potentially send two very different worlds on a collision course? Solomon says this situation is extremely common and cautions that it’s critical to build a firm framework at the outset.

Fully discuss how to protect the relationship, where family stuff fits in at the office and what boundaries look like. Name your roles aloud as if reintroducing yourself, she suggests. For example, you could say, “I am your little sister. I will always be your little sister. And yet, when we’re in the workplace, I’m your boss.”

Have an honest conversation about all these types of potential pitfall issues. Then, create a set of clear agreements you’ll have waiting to fall back on.

“In the best of situations, it’s enriching. But how you start matters,” she says.

This article appears in the January 2025 issue of SUCCESS+ Magazine. Photo courtesy of lassedesignen/Shutterstock

The post Should We Tailor Our Emotional Responses to Each Situation or Always Be Consistent? appeared first on SUCCESS.

It embodies grit, determination and strength, pushing us to overcome difficulties and emerge even stronger. 

Whether you’re navigating personal struggles or professional setbacks, perseverance is a key ingredient for success. You can look to different strategies to develop a higher level of perseverance and learn from others who have embodied this important trait. From famous figures to modern thinkers, countless voices remind us of the power of perseverance and persistence. In this article, we’ve curated powerful perseverance quotes to motivate and inspire you through tough times.

Motivational Quotes About Perseverance

Motivational quotes about perseverance can provide the extra push you need to keep going when times get tough. They serve as reminders that obstacles are part of the journey and can often lead to growth. We all struggle with persevering at times, but taking practical steps like building a support network, keeping goals in mind and taking care of our physical health can help. Being willing to take risks and focusing on small improvements can also give us the motivation we need.  

Whether you’re facing a setback or chasing a dream, these quotes encourage persistence and focus.

• “It does not matter how slowly you go as long as you do not stop.” —Confucius
• “The only way to achieve the impossible is to believe it is possible.” —Charles Kingsleigh, Alice in Wonderland (2010 film)
• “Through perseverance, many people win success out of what seemed destined to be certain failure.” —Benjamin Disraeli
• “Perseverance is not a long race; it is many short races one after the other.” —Walter Elliot
• “Fall seven times, stand up eight.” —Japanese proverb
• “Great works are performed not by strength but by perseverance.” —Samuel Johnson
• “The only limit to our realization of tomorrow is our doubts of today.” —Franklin D. Roosevelt
• “Dreams don’t work unless you do.” —John C. Maxwell
• “Perseverance is failing 19 times and succeeding the 20th.” —Julie Andrews
• “A winner is just a loser who tried one more time.” —George M. Moore Jr.

Related Reading: 30 Inspiring Quotes About Never Giving Up

Famous Inspirational Quotes About Perseverance

These famous quotes about perseverance highlight the importance of staying strong even when you feel that all the odds are against you. They come from influential writers and thinkers who recognize that persistence is often crucial to achievement.

• “Energy and persistence conquer all things.” —Benjamin Franklin
• “The path to success is to take massive, determined action.” —Tony Robbins
• “You may encounter many defeats, but you must not be defeated.” —Maya Angelou
• “Success is how high you bounce when you hit bottom.” —George S. Patton
• “It always seems impossible until it’s done.” —Nelson Mandela
• “Courage doesn’t always roar. Sometimes courage is the quiet voice at the end of the day saying, ‘I will try again tomorrow.’” —Mary Anne Radmacher
• “Rivers know this: there is no hurry. We shall get there some day.” —A.A. Milne, Winnie-the-Pooh
• “It is important to fight and fight again, and keep fighting, for only then can evil be kept at bay though never quite eradicated.” —J.K. Rowling, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince
• “Act as if what you do makes a difference. It does.” —William James

Related Reading: 21 Motivational Quotes About Strength

Some Of The Best Quotes About Perseverance In Hard Times

Hard times test our resilience. Yet these quotes remind us that perseverance can help us weather the storm and emerge stronger than ever. Life’s most challenging moments often lead to personal growth and breakthroughs if we’re determined to push forward.

• “Out of difficulties grow miracles.” —Jean de La Bruyère
• “The human spirit is stronger than anything that can happen to it.” —C.C. Scott
• “Tough times never last, but tough people do.” —Robert H. Schuller
• “When you come to the end of your rope, tie a knot and hang on.” —Proverb from the California Folklore Quarterly, 1946 
• “Storms make trees take deeper roots.” —Dolly Parton
• “A river cuts through rock not because of its power, but because of its persistence.” —James Watkins
• “No pressure, no diamonds.” —Thomas Carlyle
• “You never know how strong you are until being strong is your only choice.” —Bob Marley
• “You have power over your mind—not outside events. Realize this, and you will find strength.” —Marcus Aurelius

Related Reading: 65 Uplifting Quotes for Positive Vibes

Short Sayings to Inspire Endurance & Help You Persevere

Sometimes, brief words pack the most punch. Short quotes can act as daily affirmations, offering quick encouragement to help you stay strong during life’s ups and downs. Strength and patience can help you press on. These short perseverance quotes can remind us to focus on what we can do to keep moving forward.

• “Keep calm and carry on.” —Britain’s Ministry of Information, World War II
• “Strength does not come from physical capacity. It comes from an indomitable will.” —Mahatma Gandhi
• “You miss 100% of the shots you don’t take.” —Wayne Gretzky
• “Perseverance, secret of all triumphs.” —Victor Hugo
• “The best way out is always through.” —Robert Frost
• “I am not afraid of storms, for I am learning how to sail my ship.” —Louisa May Alcott, Little Women
• “He conquers who endures.” —Persius

Find Strength With Quotes About Determination & Perseverance

Determination and perseverance go hand in hand. These quotes highlight how focus and grit can help you push through difficulties and achieve your goals, no matter how distant they may seem. 

If you’re struggling with the hard work of pressing on, be patient with yourself. You can promote perseverance by considering how you’ve pushed forward in the past. You can also set small, reachable goals, think about how you can learn from your mistakes or consider how to change your approach on something. There’s growth in moving forward and pressing on, and it doesn’t have to always look the same in every situation.

•  “You can not fail in any laudable object, unless you allow your mind to be improperly directed.” —Abraham Lincoln
• “Life is not easy for any of us. But what of that? We must have perseverance and above all confidence in ourselves. We must believe that we are gifted for something, and that this thing, at whatever cost, must be attained.” —Marie Curie
• “Permanence, perseverance and persistence in spite of all obstacles, discouragements and impossibilities: It is this, that in all things distinguishes the strong soul from the weak.” —Thomas Carlyle
• “Victory belongs to the most persevering.” —Napoleon Bonaparte
• “The difference between the impossible and the possible lies in a person’s determination.” —Tommy Lasorda
• “Determination gives you the resolve to keep going in spite of the roadblocks that lay before you.” —Denis Waitley
• “Persistence is the twin sister of excellence. One is a matter of quality; the other, a matter of time.” —Marabel Morgan
• “To succeed, work hard, never give up and above all, cherish a magnificent obsession.” —Walt Disney
• “I am not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions.” —Stephen R. Covey

Embrace Perseverance to Overcome Challenges

Perseverance is one of the backbones of success, enabling us to turn failures into stepping stones that get us where we want to be. Sometimes it’s the little things, whether it’s taking practical steps to increase our perseverance or getting inspired with powerful sayings, that can propel us forward. 

Whether you need motivation for a personal goal or in a professional capacity, these perseverance quotes serve as reminders to stay determined and resilient. Keep pushing forward—success often lies just beyond the struggle.

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The post 45 Perseverance Quotes to Inspire Determination & Endurance appeared first on SUCCESS.

Emotional intelligence is a crucial component of leadership. Research shows that 90% of top performers in the workplace have high emotional intelligence. 

While some people are naturally more adept at emotional intelligence, EI can be learned, developed and enhanced. If you’re wondering how to increase your emotional intelligence, we have you covered. In this article we’ll dive more into what emotional intelligence is, the components of EI and how to improve it, no matter what chapter of life you’re in. 

What Is Emotional Intelligence?

In a nutshell, emotional intelligence is how well individuals identify and manage their own emotions and react to the emotions of others. It’s understanding how those emotions shape your thoughts and actions so you can have greater control over your behavior and develop the skills to manage yourself more effectively. 

Origins

The term emotional intelligence was originally used by researchers, Peter Salavoy and John Mayer, in their 1990 article “Emotional Intelligence” found in the journal Imagination, Cognition, and Personality. The concept was popularized by psychologist Daniel Goleman in his 1995 book Emotional Intelligence. Research continues to evolve in the field of emotional intelligence. 

Emotional Intelligence Models

There are various models of emotional intelligence. These include: 

• Ability Models: These models “define emotional intelligence as the ability to perceive, understand, manage and use emotions.” 
• Trait Models: These models view EI as a naturally occurring set of emotional traits and competencies.
• Mixed Models: These models see emotional intelligence as combined traits and abilities, plus acquired skills and strategies.   

Emotional intelligence can be assessed using different tests based on various models. For example, the Mayer-Salovey-Caruso Emotional Intelligence Test (MSCEIT) is based on an ability model, the Trait Emotional Intelligence Questionnaire (TEIQue) was developed based on a trait model and the Emotional Competency Inventory (ECBI) derived from a mixed model. 

Core Components Of Emotional Intelligence & How To Improve Them 

Why is emotional intelligence important? As we’ll dive into below, EI can be a critical component in understanding yourself and others, relating to people in your personal and professional spheres, communicating effectively, making decisions, handling stress and more. 

Four key components of good emotional intelligence include: self-awareness, self-regulation, social awareness and good social skills. You can improve these through simple methods you can incorporate into your everyday life. 

Self-Awareness

Self-awareness is the foundation of emotional intelligence, and it builds from there. People with good self-awareness tend to have high emotional intelligence. Self-awareness is considered the cornerstone of emotional intelligence and the other components of EI depend on it. 

Margaret Andrews, a Harvard instructor on emotional intelligence, puts it in these terms: “If you’re aware of your own emotions and the behaviors they trigger, you can begin to manage your emotions and behaviors.” She shares that it’s critical to be aware that our emotions impact our mood, behaviors and interactions with others. Andrews explains that since we are always having emotions, “the question is whether you are aware of these emotions and the impact they have on your behavior—and other people.” 

In the workplace, leaders who are highly self-aware and know how to properly manage their emotions are better equipped to perceive others’ feelings and motivate other employees. Research in the Harvard Business Review found that teams with members who lack self-awareness make poor decisions and often lack good conflict management. 

Developing this self-awareness is the foundational element to better decision-making and enhanced relationships—both with oneself and others. 

Use effective strategies for developing self-awareness like:

• Keeping a diary: Start by writing down what happened to you at the end of every day, how it made you feel and how you dealt with it. This can be a great way to get an accurate gauge of yourself and discover patterns that need work. 
• Acknowledge emotional triggers: Learn to identify and acknowledge emotional triggers and give these feelings and emotions time to process, but don’t allow them to take over you. 
• Mindfulness practices: This can be especially helpful for managing emotional triggers. Get in touch with your breath, listen to the sounds around you, the air on your skin, the feeling of your feet on the ground. Practice mindfulness of all your sensations. 

Self-Regulation

Harvard Health Publishing defines self-regulation as “the act of controlling your behaviors, thoughts, emotions, choices and impulses.” This is an important skill set because it can help us react appropriately even in stressful situations. It can help us keep our emotional and physical behaviors in check, plus help us be mindful and intentional when facing stressors. Self-regulation includes cognitive aspects (thought patterns), emotions and behaviors.  

Self-awareness is a precursor to establishing good self-regulation. Through self-awareness, we can recognize different thought patterns, emotions and behaviors. Self-regulation can help us challenge those unhelpful thought patterns, maintaining control over our emotions and intentionally choosing appropriate behaviors. Self-regulations can help us be aware of our behaviors before, during and after an incident—then we can evaluate our responses and make changes where needed. 

Self-regulation is critical in many areas of our lives. Those with an ability to self-regulate well tend to handle frustration and stress better. They also tend to have more self-confidence and better self-esteem, can calm or motivate themselves when needed, and have greater persistence and resilience when faced with challenges. 

If you’re struggling with self-regulation try some of these techniques: 

• Mindfulness: Mindfulness promotes self-awareness, which can lead to better self-regulation. Breathing exercises, gratitude journaling, meditation and practicing living in the moment are simple mindfulness practices that can help us be more aware and self-regulate.
• Monitor your body: According to Verywell Mind, one of the ways you can self-regulate is to do a mental body scan to gain an understanding of the emotions you’re feeling. For example, pause and notice if your heart rate has increased, your muscles are tense or you’re breathing heavily. 
• Stress management: Focus on managing stress effectively through progressive muscle relaxation, visualization exercises or journaling. If your stress is not manageable alone, try seeking out professional help. 

Social Awareness 

Social awareness is our ability to sense and tune into the emotions of others. It helps us to recognize and understand others’ needs, perspectives and feelings. It also helps us to have empathy. Empathy can be described as having three components—identifying what others feel, sharing this emotion and wishing to improve their experience. It’s important to remember that empathy is not about how you would feel in their situation, but rather, how they actually feel.

Having good social awareness is fundamental to our relationships and interactions with others. Those with good social awareness tend to communicate, connect and collaborate well. Strong social awareness skills also help us to be more kind, respectful and generous. It can also help people adapt and change to different social situations, respond to others with kind but open feedback and facilitate a calm environment in a group.  

Techniques that can help you build good social awareness and empathy are:

• Listen: Before you’re able to empathize with someone, you first need to understand what it is they’re saying, which means actively listening.
• Be approachable: Try to remain accessible and approachable regardless of how you feel. 
• Open yourself up: One of the quickest ways to offer a sincere exchange or sign of empathy is to not only listen to someone’s experiences but also connect to it by sharing a similar experience of your own. 
• Be mindful: Although at times sharing a similar experience can be a powerful way to help you connect, some recent research suggests that you don’t have to have a similar experience to be empathetic. In fact, the opposite may be true. Approaching another person with a fresh mindset—and not assuming you know what they are going through—could go a long way in gaining understanding and empathy.   

Social Skills

In emotional intelligence terms, social skills refer to those needed to handle and influence other people’s emotions properly and effectively. Social skills, which include influence, conflict management, teamwork and the ability to inspire others, make it possible to build and maintain healthy relationships in all parts of your life—whether at work or personally.

People with strong social skills can make a huge difference on a team and in organizations because they understand others and act on this knowledge to move people toward a common goal. Studies show that good social skills also help people develop resilience, which can combat psychological distress in challenging situations. 

Methods for improving personal social skills include:

• Active listening: This applies to social skills just as it does to social awareness. Make a genuine effort to truly listen to what the other person has to say.
• Engaging in social activities: The more exposure you get to social situations, the better your interpersonal skills become. Practice makes perfect. 
• Seeking feedback: Being active for genuine and candid feedback from others can be a good first step. Remember to not take feedback personally. 

Quick Fact: Different emotional intelligence models categorize core aspects slightly differently. The Goleman theory, for example, includes these five components of EI: self-awareness, self-regulation, social skills, empathy and motivation. 

Go Deeper: 24 Dos and Don’ts to Improve Your Emotional Intelligence

High Emotional Intelligence Examples

We’re constantly inundated with different emotions and stressors, but learning how to develop emotional intelligence can help. See some practical examples of emotional intelligence you can apply in everyday life. 

1. Accepting feedback from others without being defensive. 
2. Being aware of your own emotions and using good self-regulation strategies to manage your behaviors and actions. 
3. Being aware of others’ emotions and reacting in a way that shows empathy and understanding.  
4. Resolving conflict in a healthy manner. 
5. Setting your own boundaries and respecting the boundaries of others. 
6. Being accountable for your own actions without blaming others. 
7. Being able to communicate effectively in a clear, caring way. 
8. Awareness of team or group dynamics and knowing how to respond appropriately (i.e. knowing when to lead or how to jump in as a team player). 
9. Having resilience—seeing setbacks as opportunities for growth.
10. Being present and supportive to those around you. 
11. Navigating difficult conversations with compassion and empathy. 
12. Being curious and self-reflective about your own reactions in order to increase self-awareness and self-regulation.  
13. Listening and responding with empathy rather than minimizing another person’s feelings. 
14. Having an open mind about other people’s perspectives and discussing different points of view in a non-confrontational way. 
15. Creating inclusive environments where others feel valued. 
16. Being adaptable and sensitive to how change impacts others around you. 
17. Taking complete responsibility for your own emotions. 
18. Consistently working to develop better self-awareness. 
19. Understanding the impact of your emotions on others. 
20. Fostering a collaborative environment and promoting a culture of learning and growth. 

Emotional Intelligence And Leadership

Good emotional intelligence is necessary for good leadership and must be continuously honed. You can have all the technical skills in the world, but if you aspire to be in a leadership role, there’s an emotional element to consider. 

Strong emotional intelligence in leaders can have many powerful benefits for the workplace or other group dynamics. These include: 

• Better ability for leaders to handle workplace relationships
• Creating more positive group dynamics
• Enhancing collaboration and communication
• Leadership making more empathetic decisions that considers the needs and perspectives of employees or groups 
• Building trust among colleagues or teams 
• Enabling leaders to handle conflict in a more productive manner
• Addressing potential burnout among employees
• Recognizing and appreciating employees’ efforts
• Approaching change with positivity
• Establishing greater overall employee engagement   

When leaders improve emotional intelligence, it can lead to greater effectiveness as a leader, more team cohesion and improved relationships. Continuing to revisit and improve your emotional intelligence can help you become a stronger, more capable leader.  

Emotional Intelligence In The Workplace 

Emotional intelligence can also be crucial in the workplace. No matter what position a person is in, good EI could help with: 

• Problem-solving
• Regulating emotions
• Empathizing and relating to coworkers
• Increasing collaboration and teamwork 
• Building trust 
• Effective communication 
• Better decision-making
• Improved performance  

Improving Your Emotional Intelligence In Everyday Conversations 

Improving your emotional intelligence might look like adopting some of these phrases (and meaning it).

1. “Could you tell me more about that?”

Communicating in a way that encourages people to talk about their feelings and experiences shows you care about their feelings, and you can use their responses as a learning opportunity.

2. “I hear you.”

By telling someone that you hear them or understand them, you create a cooperative environment that is perfect for team-building.

3. “I understand what you’re saying, but…”

This phrase highlights another important aspect of emotional intelligence: the ability to remain diplomatic even if one doesn’t agree with someone. 

4. “I’m not sure what’s wrong. Could you explain the problem?”

This phrase acknowledges someone is having an issue, and instead of reacting negatively, you invite them to share their thoughts.

5. “How do you feel about that?”

This phrase expresses empathy and helps people feel acknowledged and respected.

6. “I’d love your input on this.”

Asking for input or expressing openness allows someone else to feel proud of themselves, making them think very positively about you.

Improve Your EI To Thrive Personally And Professionally 

Concepts like self-awareness, self-regulation, social skills and social awareness are the foundation of emotional intelligence. Mastering these will help you make massive strides in life, and you can start with simple steps and actions. From increasing self-awareness through mindfulness to learning how to communicate using high emotional intelligence with others around you, there are many ways to develop in this area. Improving emotional intelligence is a continuous journey with many challenges, but persistence is crucial for growth—both personally and professionally. 

Emotional Intelligence FAQs

If you need a quick run-through of the importance of EI and how to improve it, these FAQS can help. 

Why Are Emotional Intelligence Skills Important? 

Emotional intelligence skills are important in understanding and reacting to both our own emotions and the emotions of others. It can help us have healthier, more empathetic responses and reactions, improve our decision-making skills, improve communication, forge stronger relationships and achieve goals. It can enhance our personal well-being as well as our interactions in the workplace. It can also help us excel in leadership, create stronger team dynamics and encourage nurturing, collaborative environments. 

Can Emotional Intelligence Be Learned? 

Different models of emotional intelligence focus on different aspects. Some focus primarily on ability, some on natural traits and some on mixed aspects that include both ability, traits and learned skills. Regardless of the theory, however, people can learn to improve or develop their emotional intelligence by fostering self-awareness, regulating their emotions and improving social awareness and social skills, including empathy, conflict management and active listening.

How Is Emotional Intelligence Measured? 

Emotional intelligence can be measured using a number of different EI assessments, such as the Mayer-Salovey-Caruso Emotional Intelligence Test (MSCEIT), the Trait Emotional Intelligence Questionnaire (TEIQue) and the Emotional Quotient Inventory (EQ-i 2.0). However, other methods can be used to assess emotional intelligence, including observation of behavior, feedback from others and performance-based tests.

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Enter the personal brand statement. 

Whether you’re representing yourself as an individual or you’re fully embodying your own brand—as someone like Oprah Winfrey does—a personal brand statement can be beneficial. Building a strong personal brand includes creating awareness of who you are, but it’s also critical to portray the brand image you want. Creating a positive impression through your brand statement can be powerful. 

Related: How to Build Your Personal Brand 

What Is A Personal Brand Statement?

Your brand statement, written by you for you, quickly conveys your professional narrative. It encompasses your past experiences and future goals. It makes the perfect asset to share when marketing yourself online or in real-life situations—think networking events or job fairs.

Creating a personal brand statement is similar to building your own tagline or slogan. Large brands are masters of this craft. Target reels people in with its assertion to “Expect more. Pay less.” Meanwhile, Ford promises its cars are “Built to Last.”  

Your statement will admittedly be a bit longer—around one to three sentences is a general rule of thumb. However, you can take a page out of these brands’ playbooks by adding your own unique value proposition. In a nutshell, you’ll summarize what you do, who you serve and what sets you apart from others in your field of work—in a clever, snappy or memorable way. This will act as your north star as you continue building your professional brand. It simultaneously allows you to showcase yourself and your work to others. 

You may be thinking, “This sounds just like a mission statement.” While the two are similar, a mission statement focuses on the overarching principles and objectives of an entire brand or organization, and a personal brand statement hones in on your own one-of-a-kind professional identity. 

Related: ​​Why Building a Personal Brand Is an Act of Self-Empowerment

How to Write A Personal Brand Statement

Constructing your personal brand statement doesn’t have to be difficult. Chances are you have already begun the process as you’ve carved your career path. But maybe you’ve never taken the time to write it down on paper. 

Follow these steps—relevant to any industry or position—to compose an effective and memorable personal brand statement. Then, we’ll share some successful personal branding examples to inspire you.  

1. Identify Your Strengths And Expertise

Start by establishing your area of professional focus. Then, dig in even further to your specialization, best attributes and skills. Use action words in the process such as “I help…” or “I create…”

2. Define Your Target Audience

Who are you trying to reach? You may want to speak directly to clients, customers, recruiters, employers, leaders or maybe industry peers. Tailor your wording to your audience or mention them specifically in your text. For example, “Startup brands hire me to…” 

3. Pinpoint Your Value Proposition

This is arguably the most important piece of the personal branding puzzle. The part where you articulate the specific business need you address and the unique solution you offer that makes you valuable. Don’t exaggerate. However, you can make use of concrete numbers such as your years of experience or figures that speak to your results when applicable. 

4. Keep It Clear And Concise

Get to the point early in your statement and only include information that is necessary and supportive. Your audience is much more likely to remember a short, to-the-point statement than a long-winded paragraph. 

5. Add Personality And Creativity

This is where the memorable part comes into play. Your personal brand isn’t the same as anyone else’s, so your personal brand statement shouldn’t sound like anyone else’s. Don’t be afraid to let your character and individuality peek through. 

6. Revise And Refine

As you develop and grow in your career, your personal brand statement will need to be tweaked to reflect your latest experiences and updated goals. Periodically circle back to keep it relevant. 

Quick tip: Your brand statement is your own. Being authentic and genuine can build trust, create connections and help you be relatable to your audience. Authenticity can help make your brand statement powerful and uniquely yours. 

Personal Brand Statement Examples

Model personal brand statements can be found all over the internet on platforms like LinkedIn and personal websites. Professionals use them to introduce themselves in a quick yet lively way, immediately relaying who they are and how they can help their audience. Check out the following sample branding statements from individuals across multiple industries for inspiration. 

Example 1: Kayla Itsines, Fitness Industry 

I’m Kayla Itsines, Sweat’s cofounder and head trainer. I’ve been helping women around the world feel confident and strong since 2008, and my programs can help you achieve your goals and take control of your fitness in a way that fits into your lifestyle. —Kayla Itsines

Why it works: Kayla speaks to her extensive experience and clearly states her target audience: women around the world. She establishes herself as a leader in the fitness world and her value add is that her programs can be tailored to anyone’s schedule. 

Example 2: Christopher Nguyen, UX Design

I help UX designers go from fuzziness to focused, now freedom. —Christopher Nguyen

Why it works: This short and sweet one-liner relays the message that Christopher is a coach and mentor for other professionals in the UX space. His expertise can help them find clarity, success and freedom in their careers. 

Example 3: Ann Smarty, Digital Marketing

With two decades of experience in the ever-evolving digital marketing landscape, I’m passionate about helping businesses leverage the power of organic search to drive growth and brand visibility. My expertise lies in creating and implementing comprehensive SEO strategies, crafting compelling content and turning insights into actionable results. —Ann Smarty

Why it works: Ann gives us a peek into her digital marketing career story. Then, she drills down further into her SEO and content specialization, ending with her overarching goal of helping businesses achieve tangible results. 

Example 4: Mari Smith, Social Media 

Often referred to as “the queen of Facebook,” Mari Smith is considered one of the world’s foremost experts on Facebook marketing and social media. —Mari Smith

Why it works: What’s better than a catchy nickname to grab people’s attention? Mari does this with ease, efficiently declaring her mastery when it comes to Facebook and social media in general. It’s clear that it’s her life’s work and passion. 

Example 5: Peter Som, Culinary Creator And Lifestyle Expert 

I believe in the magic of the everyday. It’s all about food, fashion, and home ideas that uplift and fit effortlessly into your life. —Peter Som

Why it works: Infused with whimsy and individuality—just like his brand—this brand statement example presents Peter as a content creator and influencer. He defines his three areas of focus and explains that his recipes and lifestyle ideas are unique because they are simple and easily adopted. 

How to Use Your Personal Brand Statement Effectively

Your personal brand statement will guide you in your professional journey. It’s a powerful tool you can share wherever and whenever you can to gain clients, find new opportunities or simply gain visibility. Here are a few places—both online and in real life—where you can utilize your brand statement:

• On your resume and within your cover letter
• On LinkedIn and other social media platforms
• On a personal website
• During interviews and job fairs
• During networking events and in professional communities
• During trade shows and industry events

Enhance Your Success With A Strong Personal Brand Statement 

Your personal brand statement is your career compass. It allows you to take charge of your own brand narrative and stand out in a crowded marketplace through the presentation of your unique skills. Remember to keep it clear and concise, focusing on your underlying purpose and target audience. Speaking to your value add is critical, but elevating your statement with individuality also helps to make it memorable. As you revisit your statement, consider trends in personal branding, but stay authentic and genuine. 

A well-crafted personal brand statement can help you land that job interview, grant you new clients or win you that coveted engagement. So, take the time to write one that’s bold and unforgettable. Then, never stop refining and fine-tuning it as you continue to grow. 

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